


The Gravity of the Situation

by speccygeekgrrl



Category: Mystery Science Theater 3000
Genre: Freak Masterstroke can bite the backside of the moon for all Kinga cares, Gen, I keep coming up with headcanons where Kinga kills Trump and they all make me happy, gravity laser, let. Kinga. fuck. shit. up., solar eclipse, wanton destruction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 09:11:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11871165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/speccygeekgrrl/pseuds/speccygeekgrrl
Summary: Doomsday lasers are passe, huh? What about when they're magnified by the power of a full solar eclipse? HUH? WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT, FREAK MASTERSTROKE?





	The Gravity of the Situation

**Author's Note:**

> Gratuitous eclipse fic, because... why the hell not? Very short, possibly dumb, plz enjoy.

"Freak Masterstroke made fun of this idea," Max said hesitantly, and Kinga aimed a poisonous glare at him.

"Freak Masterstroke doesn't run Moon 13. Screw him. We won't have another chance like this for seven years, we have to do it today."

"Okay, but... are you really sure you _want_ to do it and you're not just doing it because you _can_?"

"What's the difference?" she asked, and he sighed.

"Never mind. So what hapless coastal city are we demolishing today?"

"I don't know... you think we should do something in Florida? I mean, it's all doomed anyways, we're just speeding up the timeline."

"Makes sense to me," Max said, and brought up a map of Florida on the screen. Both their heads tilted as they looked at it.

"I really hate Miami the most," Kinga said. 

"But the wetlands near it are important," he pointed out. "I thought you hated Orlando the most."

"Orlando isn't coastal."

"What about Tampa?"

"Wait, wait a sec..." Kinga typed something in, scrolled out slightly, and pointed at the screen. "West Palm Beach. Perfect."

"Oh, that's good," Max said. "I mean, bad. That's very bad. That's quite evil. You realize he's going to take that as an act of war."

"What do I care? What's he going to do, nuke the moon? If we're lucky, he'll be at Mar-a-Lago when the wave hits."

"Wait, you were never super clear about this plan with me... I thought it was threatening for ransom?"

"It was going to be, but you know, I just want to fuck some shit up right now more than I want money," she said with that mad glint in her eye he was all too familiar with.

"Don't let me stop you if you're having fun."

"I'm not having fun yet, but I will be as soon as we fire up the gravity lasers. You know, I didn't calculate for this much tidal force when I came up with this idea, it's going to be more destructive than I planned for."

"That's not giving you pause, is it?"

"Hell no."

"Uh... do you mind if I mitigate the body count a little?" She rolled her eyes and turned to face him.

"You're so soft-hearted. What are you going to do, tweet an evacuation notice?" He went pink, and she smirked. "Go ahead. Do what you can, if you must. The tidal force will peak... hm... you've got an hour and a half. And I'll still need your help getting this all in motion." 

"Of course. I'll meet you in the lab in fifteen minutes?"

"Make it ten." Max went off to do whatever minimally heroic thing he was planning, and Kinga looked back at the map, folding her arms thoughtfully. "Doomsday lasers are passe, huh? Just watch me. The world will cower before the unstoppable power of Kinga Forrester!" She started laughing maniacally as she walked away from the screen and toward her first proper act of large-scale destruction.


End file.
